Butterflies: freedom from OCD


Butterflies represent freedom. In many cultures they are symbols of the soul. Their intricate patterns and graceful moves are mesmerising and draw you into a moment with nature, that is both profound and spiritual.

I have been thinking a lot about butterflies recently. It was when I began to make book art, using a butterfly as my muse, that I felt a need for my own rising sense of freedom.

All my life I have suffered from overwhelming and overpowering anxiety. It fuels my OCD and restricts my development and my transformation into a happier, more artistic being. I am frightened of so many things. This fear traps me inside a cocoon of my own making and I feel suffocated by its fibrous case. I try to escape on a daily basis, but only manage to claw through a few layers and I never actually see daylight; unlike the butterfly that eventually transforms itself and accepts its new state of being with wholehearted grace. I want to be free, to accept a new destiny, but I have lived for so long in the grip of anxiety that I don’t know how to really live anymore.

To be free of anxiety would be to be free like a butterfly.

Maybe this freedom will only occur when my soul is set free from my body. After all, it is no mere coincidence, that butterflies represent the soul in so many of our cultures. Maybe the first person to ever see a butterfly, also felt anxious like me.

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